- Year
- 2023
- Medium
- Acrylic on canvas
- Dimensions
- 195 × 130 cm
Part of the Muscle Memory series.
The starting point for this work is the simulation of power that systems offer to the individual. American gun culture is one geographical manifestation in which this mechanism becomes particularly visible.
The illusion of power begins by making the individual feel in control of their own life and surroundings. A system in which gun ownership becomes normalized makes a similar promise: You are powerful enough to protect yourself. Your safety is in your own hands.
The gun then becomes more than a means of self-defense. It becomes an object that gives the individual an almost godlike sense of power over life and death. But this raises another question:
If you have to be constantly prepared to protect yourself, are you really safe?
Everyone is protecting themselves and everyone is a little more afraid.
At this point, the gun becomes less a symbol of power than a physical manifestation of fear. Fear is not simply an individual emotion; it can be produced by a system, circulated through society, and eventually normalized.
In the painting, everyone somehow appears as both a threat and a target. The everyday and the violent, safety and fear, freedom and defense begin to merge. Eventually, it becomes increasingly difficult to distinguish the ordinary from the horrific.
I Lost My American Dream is therefore not simply a painting about America or gun ownership. America becomes the setting through which a broader critique of systems and power takes shape.
The more people arm themselves in order to feel protected, the more powerful they may appear. Yet perhaps what the system has really achieved is to leave everyone a little more afraid and a little more alone.
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